CHAPTER TWENTY TWO THERE IS SUNSHINE IN MY SOUL

CHAPTER TWENTY TWO

THERE IS SUNSHINE IN MY SOUL

“Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow.”  Helen Keller said this even though she couldn’t see the sunshine!  She was an amazing woman who overcame incredible obstacles.  She is proof that we can find hope in the very worst situation.  The first big change necessary for a successful journey is to learn how to find the good and the positive in the worst of times.

We spent the last days of 2012 in sunny California with our daughter, Shelly, and her beautiful family.  After being in the frozen world of Utah, sitting in the radiant sunshine on her front porch was a gift and blessing.  I almost stayed home because of my broken ribs, but Shelly encouraged me to come, reminding me that I would be in pain either at home or at her   place.  We enjoyed being outside breathing in the moist ocean. Wilf rode his bike while I walked around the streets in Shelly's neighborhood. It was good to be outside in the sunshine.

We had a consultation with Dr. Steenblock, a pioneer of  Stem Cell Therapy.  In just one week after we learned about him,  we were at his office in Mission Viejo, thirty minutes from Shelly's home.  This was a miracle to me!   Dr. Steenblock believed his treatments could help me, so I began the preliminary testing that day.  We spent a lovely week walking on the beach, watching the sun set over the ocean and enjoying the Holbrook family. 

We drove to Arizona where we rented a house next door to Jack and Denny. Lois and Ef Orgill, joined us after a few days and we spent the next three weeks enjoying the sun and Denny’s amazing kindness, meeting cousins and friends and picking delicious citrus fruit.  Wilf rode his bike every day and I walked around the streets, picking tangelos and oranges, and admiring the cactus and palm trees. I felt like I was in a healing spa; walking in the warm sun, exercising at the gym, swimming in the pool, reading in the sunshine and eating delicious citrus fruit while my broken ribs were healing.   It was just what doctors should prescribe.

Abundance of tangelos make me smile!

I felt so blessed and grateful to have this time to heal and soak up the sunshine.  It was a wonderful way to begin the new year, bringing hope of good things to come.  Sharron helped us pick a truckload of grapefruits, oranges, lemons and tangelos.  It’s such a blessing to take this delicious sun drenched citrus fruit back to frozen Utah.  These little  balls of sunshine would cheer and bless our family and remind me of God’s abundant gifts. After twelve hours driving through near zero temperatures with our truck load of citrus it was good to be home! 

                                  Sharron's oranges and grapefruit on one tree.

The next morning, I awoke to a freezing cold and grey world but there was sunshine in my soul.  My heart was filled with gratitude for the wonderful days in the sunshine, waiting for my ribs to heal. I am overwhelmed with gratitude for Denny, Jack, and Sharron and their amazing generosity. The Arizona sunshine is a beautiful gift for an ailing spirit, as is a loving husband who patiently cared for me while I was unable to do much of anything.  He kindly waited on me, helping me  in and  out of our truck and  doing everything for me that I couldn’t do for myself.

                                        Jack and Denny happy in Arizona.

Resting and relaxing in Arizona was so good for me. Everyone should  slow down and  pay attention to their health.  Our health is our greatest wealth, but we don’t realize it until it’s too late!  If we lose our health we lose everything.  The body is a wonderful gift we often take for granted.  I am filled with awe as I contemplate the amazing healing machine the body is, mending my broken ribs and hopefully regenerating new brain cells.  I’m grateful for my amazing body that heals itself!  As I think of all my blessings there is sunshine in my soul! President Uchtdorf said:

“No matter our circumstances, no matter our challenges or trials, there is something in each day to embrace and cherish.  There is something in each day that can bring gratitude and joy, if only we will see and appreciate it.  Perhaps we should be looking less with our eyes and more with our hearts.  One sees clearly only with the heart.  Isn’t it better to see with our eyes and hearts even the small things we can be thankful for rather than magnifying the negative in our current condition.”

 

An adversarial view of life motivates most of us.  We look at life as if it were a constant test, that life is tough, and only those able to overcome the trials and tribulations are able to survive.  There is energy in this view of life that eventually wears us down.  A visionary view looks at life from a different perspective.  Instead of “we have to,” it is “we get to.”  We then look at life as opportunities instead of challenges to overcome.  When we stay in higher levels of consciousness, inspiration comes.  We can all try to live this way, staying in a place of peace rather than dwelling on problems to overcome.  Problems do arise, but the visionary person works through these troubled times smoother, easier, and quicker than the adversarial person. Every day we find ourselves in situations where the outcome can be influenced by whether we react with fear or faith.  This goes beyond maintaining a positive attitude, it’s a feeling of a positive outcome. Visualize the desired outcome and enter into the feeling of success, not just hoping things will turn out, but experiencing the emotion as if they already have.  This is a wonderful way to live our lives.  It's the difference between living in the sunshine or living in the shadows.                                               

Gratitude is the power to give sight to the blind, it changes the way we see things! My beautiful life changed when I lost my sweet brother and my youthful vitality with Parkinson’s.  I feel like I became my Mom, especially since I broke my ribs; now I move slowly and carefully like an old person.  How did all this come about so quickly?   I can barely recognize my own life, but I’m very grateful for my life and my  many blessings! I gratefully acknowledge the 69 years of near perfect health that I’ve been blessed with.  My life has been a sweet dream compared to my cousin, my sisters, my brothers and so many who lost their health at an early age.  My body is a wonderful gift that has served me well these many years.    My heart is full of gratitude and compassion for my beautiful right hand, as I watch it work hard with tremors.  I send it love and healing and thank it for serving me well all of my life.  I bless all of my organs and send them gratitude.  Now I care for my body with love, kindness and appreciation and ask for forgiveness for taking it for granted all these years. I am very grateful for Wilf, my wonderful companion.  He is becoming an excellent care giver, like my Dad who took care of my Mom in her last years.

                                             My Dad, a good example!

President Henry B. Eyring’s children were very small when he started to write a few things each day.   He said:

“One night many years ago I heard in my mind,  “I’m not giving you these experiences for yourself.  Write them down.”  I was to record for my children to read, someday in the future, how I had seen the hand of God blessing our family.  As I kept at it, something began to happen.  As I would cast my mind over the day, I would see evidence of what God had done, that I had not recognized in the busy moments of the day.  I realized that trying to remember had allowed God to show me what He had done.  More than gratitude began to grow in my heart."

My heart is full of gratitude as I recognize God's hand in my life each day.  'm grateful that our family business is doing well, growing and beginning to prosper and finally paying us back each month.  We’ve seen miracles happen with new lines and new employees.  I gratefully acknowledge God’s hand in these miracles.  True prosperity always has a spiritual basis, and true spirituality brings prosperity. Our family is prospering as they grow in righteousness.

                                          Amazing women in our family.

I’m grateful for our beautiful large family. They are all talented, smart and healthy.  Our children are great parents doing a marvelous job raising their families. We have great joy and rejoicing in our posterity.  These are peaceful and pleasant days and our family is doing well!  How blessed we are to live close to three precious daughters, granddaughters and a niece. I’m surrounded by sweet children and grandchildren who watch and pray for me, and help me.  

We are very grateful that our daughter, Laura, has found happiness with her new husband, Bob Love.  They have a big job with nine children between the two of them, but they are working hard together and are off to a good start!  We prayed for so many years that a good man would come to help her and our prayers have been answered.  

                              Happy wedding day for Laura and Bob!

We are very grateful for the Lord's hand in our life and his amazing grace that promises good to us! There is good in all things, even in bad situations.  In order to fully enjoy the good things in life, we must experience the bad things from a positive perspective.  We can’t enjoy the good if we haven’t experienced enough negative to recognize the good. Breaking my ribs was a big setback for me, increasing the tremors and weakening my muscles. The worsening  tremors made me question my earlier decision to be drug free. I tried the drug patches the doctor prescribed and got relief from the tremors.  As the patches became less effective, I started taking the Parkinson’s drugs. I miss the clear headed, drug free feeling and energy I used to have.  The drugs have created a dependency in my body; without them I have a new problem – restless leg syndrome. Even though I feel trapped in this drug cycle I'm grateful for the relief they give me. 

I’m grateful for the prayers of others in my behalf.  I believe that those who are prayed for generally live longer, heal faster, and require fewer medications than those who aren’t prayed for.  I believe that God will lead me through this just as He did in Cambodia He blessed me with gifts, talents, and strength to do things I never thought possible; to speak the language, play the piano, teach English and piano. I truly have experienced his hand in my life.  

      

                      Playing the piano for Relief Society in Cambodia.

In Cambodia I learned to walk with the Savior, but I forgot so easily when I returned to the comforts of my home. He never gives up on me, even though I keep messing up!    I want to fill my life with his light just like I did when I was a missionary.  There I climbed to the summit, saw the views and felt the highs.  Now I’m relearning how to live at the lower levels of life, while still hanging on to the memory of the joy and highs of being at the summit. When we are faithful and securely attached to the Savior, He will help us walk this mortal path, climb to the summit, and overcome every challenge of mortality! 

                                          Climb to Ensign Peak summit. 

I’m grateful for the testimony of our Savior that burns bright in my soul.  It is the sunshine in my soul. I have hope and visions of a bright future as I contemplate the great joy of the resurrection!  The scriptures teach:

“The soul shall be restored to the body, and the body to the soul; yea, and every limb and joint shall be restored to its body;  yea, even a hair of the head shall not be lost; but all things shall be restored to  their proper and perfect frame.  And then shall the righteous shine forth in the kingdom of God.”  Alma 40: 23,25

This glorious message brings sunshine to my soul!